Sometimes when I’m writing, I think about the next few words I’m going to say and then I start wrting the next word instead of the word I am writing at that moment. If that doesn’t make sense to you, I basically write: “I am gone in life” instead of “I am going nowhere in life”. Or something like that…
I think this is how many of us live our lives as well. If any of you are like me, you like to plan your whole days and weeks out in advance. I like to know what is next and where I am going. Always. Sometimes, it feels like nowhere. I think that is because I think about the future too much. Thinking about the future too much makes me look forward to certain things or events more than what I am actually doing in the moment I am in. I can live life and walk around with this one future event in mind and wait for that future moment for a sense of completeness and happiness.
The truth is, that future moment is like any other moment. It will pass as quickly as the rest. Then what? Hope for the next big thing in your life again? Focus your sense of happiness on those few things? Why?
Why only allow ourselves a few moments of happiness when we can thrive on every moment every day?
At the moment, I can’t stop thinking about college… what I’m going to do with my life… getting a job… and if I will move far away. I’ve realized how silly it is worrying over this. I am so worried about what I will do with my life and that one special moment when I’ve “made it” and got that perfect job, perfect guy, perfect life put together in the future… But God has opened my eyes to what my life is all about.
While I’m so focused on what my life will become, I’ve realized that what I do with my life is a decision I make every morning when I wake up. Life is not just one moment, one job, on place, or one event. It is who you are in every moment and who you are becoming in that moment. I know that you hear this saying all the time, “How do you know how many days you have left?” So true. But how many days do you have left with the people around you? With the place you’re currently living? Those questions have hit me hard because I have two little sisters that I love so much. I just don’t really know the answer to those questions.
This next year will be my senior year and that is still sinking in. That process is as deep as the ocean and the anchor of realization is slowly falling to the bottom… But it is not quite there yet. This year will be memorable and stressful. It will go by fast and soon I’ll have to make a decision regarding which path I will take after high school. There are so many roads to take. But I know for a fact that I have a God that will lead me to the right path in His perfect timing.
His timing is something that humans tend to have a hard time adjusting to while it always works out in the end. He knows. He is in control. And this is what He has taught me through this process of learning to living in the moment:
Thrive on every day with a thankful heart for another day. Do not wait for college, money, the dream job, or that dream spouse to fufill your life. Those things can just walk into your life on any good day to make it even more special.
Isaiah 46:4- “I will be your God throughout your lifetime-
until your hair is white with age.
I made you, and I will care for you.
I will carry you along and save you.”
Isaiah 46:13- “Form I am ready to set things right,
not in the distant future,
but right now!”